Legolas: *glares*

Author: "IT GETS ANNOYING AND CONFUSING!!! Now let's get on with the battle."

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Round Three

Figwit lamented for a while about the loss of most of his clothes. Of course, he did still have the set that he had been wearing when Legolas ruined the rest of them. Thankfully, Legolas had not gotten those ones. He decided to go on a shopping spree with Sprite (the Kindly Reader) so that he could get some more clothes.

"That was fun, we should do this more often," he told Sprite when they had gotten back from their shopping spree. Sprite fainted again.

Meanwhile, Legolas was going over some gifts he had gotten from one of his many fans. He puzzled over why she had given him 12 brand-new arrows, when he already had a perfectly good set stowed away in his closet. Suddenly, a terrible thought occured to him. Legolas looked over to the glass case an the ivroy table, where his very first bow and arrow were set.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" cried Legolas. "BLASPHEMY!!!" His bow and arrows were spoiled!! Silly string, rubber chickens, spatulas! Even the pixy stix gave him no consolation, as they were empty. This called for revenge, worse than any revenge he had given so far!

"Elrond," Legolas said to Elrond and Aragorn a few minutes later in Elrond's study. "I must report to you a terrible deed that has been done to your daughter."

"What??" cried Elrond frantically. "Who did something to my baby??"

"Figwit made a move on Arwen last night as exactly 8:00 EST," Legolas announced.

"What?" cried Elrond.

"He did not!" said Aragorn indignintly. "At 8:00 EST Arwen and I were in my room. Figwit could not possibly have done anything."

"What were you and Arwen doing in your room?" asked Elrond suspiciously.

"We were..." Aragorn paused. "Studying... yeah, that's right, we were in my room studying... on the bed... uh-huh."

"Riiiight," said Elrond, annoyed since that conversation prolly brought the fic's rating up one notch.

Of course, Legolas had left by now, since Aragorn had spoiled his clever plan. He went to find Figwit.

"Figwit, we need to- Hey, where did you get all those clothes?" said Legolas when he came to Figwit's room.

"I went shopping with Sprite," Figwit said, indicating the unconcious fangirl still lying on the floor. "And Ragna has stolen all of your urple dye."

"Oh," said Legolas. "Um...is the battle still on?"

"Well, duh!" cried Figwit and indicated all of Legolas' fangirls, who Figwit had convinced to take baths in urple dye, because he said it would make Legolas love them more.

"You dyed my fangirls URPLE!!!!" cried Legolas. He broke down in sobs.

"Ha ha!" said Figwit.

Back in his room, Legolas mourned the death of all his fangirls. Well, they weren't really dead, but, since they had been dyed urple, they were as good as dead.

At least he still had arrows. for his 500th birthday, Legolas had gotten a never-ending supply of arrows. How ever many arrows he used, his quiver was still full. Oh well. Legolas left his room to see if anything could be done about his fangirls.

And Sprite snuck in to Legolas' room and stole his quiver of arrows. Naughty, naughty Sprite.

Winner of Round Three: Figwit

A/N Ok, thanks to Sprite and tenshiamanda for giving me the ideas for this chapter, and another thank-you to Sprite for being such a willing fictim. Thanks guys!

Ragna is another character from OFUM.

Oh shoot. I was thinking about how Sprite just stole Leggy's arrows, and I got a sudden image of how unbearably hott Legolas looks when he's firing his arrows. Jeez, even I don't know who should win this war!!