Sprite: Figwit's Kindly Reader and Love Interest. She has managed to control her fainting, and, after
certain events that eventuated in the Ultimate Battle, has a morbid fear of Disney. She spent part of the BIG Egos under the
control of a potion concocted by Elrond, which caused her to be in love with Seamoose.
Aldawen: Legolas's fangirl and Kindly Reader. She was able to become friends with Sprite when they found
out that they were both Canadian. Temporarily lost her voice in the Ultimate Battle, and spent most of the BIG Egos under
the control of the aforesaid potion of Elrond, which caused her to be in love with Elrohir.
Sake: Legolas's other Kindly Reader and fangirl, has a violent dislike of Elrond. She spent most of
the Ultimate Battle urple, then green, then bald, foaming at the mouth, and utterly insane. Under Elrond's potion in the BIG
Egos, she was in love with Elladan.
Seamoose: Your average fanboy. This young man adores Figwit, and came to Rivendell for the specific
purpose of meeting the Mighty Elf. First appears in BIG Egos, and saves the day in a certain sense (he saves Legolas and Figwit
from getting their hair destroyed by Elfie-Ninjas). After he got used to it, rather enjoyed having Sprite in love with him,
but wrecked it all when he kissed her. Figures.
Note: These four people (the ones above, you dolt!) are not my creations, but actual people who
reviewed my fics on fanfiction.net so enthusiastically that I added them into the story! I refer to them as my "fictims".
Heh heh heh.
Caligula: A two-humped camel, formerly known as Bob. First appears in BIG Egos, and has a British accent.
Leroy: Elrond's magic carpet. Very interested in Elvish politics, and can be easily bribed with a bottle
of Acme Carpet Cleaner. A good friend of Seamoose.
Peace and Love: Sprite and Figwit's horses. They got them in Mirkwood.
Elfie-Ninjas: Elrond's secret police. Before becoming a certified Elfie-Ninja, they must also ace the
test in cosmetology. First appear in BIG Egos.
Lord Elrond: The evil mastermind of the trilogy. Most of the stuff that happens in BIG Egos is his fault.
By the end of BIG Egos he is shrunk to six inches tall and stuck in a box like a common action figure.
Elladan, Elrohir, and Glorfindel: The helpfuls! They generally help out when things get rough, and the
Twins are always glad to thwart their father's plans. Generally Nice Guys to have around.
The Liquor Cabinet: This peice of furniture deserves a place here since the third fic in the trilogy
basically revolves around it. Given to Figwit as a gift from Sprite, the liquor cabinet spends its days sitting in Figwit's
room gathering dust.
Bilge: A member of the Brotherhood or Extremely Elite Rodents, he may or may not be the heir of the
last King Ratticus. Also standard- and message-bearer for the soon-to-be-King Elrond of Rodentell, this young rat gets to
do alot of the dirty work.
Who knows what will befall this band of friends and foes in the Liquor Cabinet of DOOM? I do, actually. But I ain't tellin'!
